How to spot a liar

Developing trust is hard and it's especially hard in the workplace. The workplace can be filled with people suffering from crabs in a barrel syndrome which means for us we need to be on top of our game on all levels. That means paying particularly close attention to subtle cues that tell us things we need to know to proactively make the right moves for our future. liar The worse feeling in our working lives is not knowing what will happen next. Being blindsided usually occurs because we aren't able to detect early signs of lies or subtle shifts in character but they are there. It's on us to know what to look for and to possess the knowledge of knowing that people can easily lie to you when they know you're hungry for something. Knowing when someone is lying to you is a great tool to keep in the arsenal and especially beneficial in the workplace when dealing with individuals are are primarily self centered and focusing on their own objectives. This may include your boss. Cues to spot when someone isn't being totally honest with you in the office is a bit easier to detect then in your personal lives but they follow the same patterns.
  1. Attitude is key! If a person wants to assist you their attitude tells you that. If a person is too quick to become defensive it's because they one don't want to offer details or assistance. They become easily agitated or very vague when talking to you. Take notice of shifts in the attitudes and interactions between yourself and others. If you notice that people are being too standoffish, cold or distant there is definitely a reason.
  2. Eye contact. It's typically thought that when people are lying they avoid eye contact but that's been found to be untrue in most cases. People can look you in the eye and lie. Actually too much eye contact or overly engaging eye contact can be a clue that the person is not being completely honest with you. Too much eye contact can be the other person trying to gauge your body language to see if you're believing their story and the conviction they're trying to give off.
  3. In cases where there is a back story a person who is trying to lie will cover certain points specifically. This is a big one and is commonly used by law enforcement when questioning a suspect. People cannot lie or keep their story straight if it's not true when trying to tell it reverse. The timeline wont match up and they'll have events that are unaccounted for. Or if they fail to provide critical details in the timeline because you're having them explain in reverse which is difficult to do when it's not rehearsed in that sequence. An easy indication of this is a person repeating the question before they answer.
  4. No laughing matter! Another signal that is often overlooked is when a person laughs or giggles after they've answered a question or have told you something. It's a natural reaction and triggered from the brain when a person thinks that they've just gotten over and can't believe that their lie is being believed. Sounds insane but it's a trigger from the internal dialog going on in the persons head.  Have you ever caught yourself asking another person why they're laughing when a chuckle or giggle seems so out of place? It's because they have just lied to you in some manner and the outward reaction to their inner dialog is the surprised laugh, chuckle or sly smirk. 

No comments:

Post a Comment